Performance, Steel Magnolias

I usually don't get nervous unless I know someone in the audience. Ken and I have actually discussed this. He seems to get a little nervous before every show. I just don't. I can't totally chalk up a lack of nerves to being confident with my lines and in the character I've created, although that is part of it. Ken suggested I had a slight case of apathy when it comes to an audience of strangers. In a sense I agree with him. Because I don't know them I probably won't be seeing them again. So it's more about entertaining them than impressing them. People I know usually have an expectation to be impressed, or maybe it's more of my desire to want to knock their socks off. I don't know.

I knew my dad and his new girlfriend and Ken were coming to the show last night. So I was a bit nervous before the show. At about 15 til curtain, Mallorie, God love her, comes back to tell me that a bunch of people from KLT were there. I stopped her after she started giving me names. My butterflies increased. I made my first entrance and immediately saw Kelly and her daughter Meghan sitting in the front row. Thankfully I didn't have time to dwell on my butterflies.

Our costume change between 1.1 and 1.2 had been getting better. I taught Lee Ann to underdress her sweater and Kay and Jodi helped her with the baby's breath and bobby pins. She and I were ready as soon as the crew exited. Carole went up on her lines and Lee Ann was the one who got the scene back on track. I was so proud of Lee Ann and I think she finally felt that she had redeemed herself. In the midst of my tender monologue, I happened to look into the audience and I saw Meghan wiping at her eyes. My brain sent up a silent YES!!

After the show, I came out to greet the audience. The KLTers were first in line. Kelly gave me a huge hug and told me how proud of me she was. I could tell she had being doing some good crying. Bill and Kathy were also there, and Kathy had red rimmed eyes. She said she was also impressed with my performance. That was a huge compliment as she stepped in to play M'Lynn when KLT produced the show a couple of years ago. My dad was very proud and his new girlfriend was equally impressed.

Mallorie and I met Ally, Mimi and Ken over at Big Shotz Tavern. (The service was a bit better, but not by much.) We chatted about the show and lots of other things. As I drove home I really felt good about my performance. I know that I have done my job as an actress when I can take words from a script and convey the emotion that affects the audience. For this show, it's not the applause that lets me know I'm hitting my mark. It's the red eyes and all the sniffling.